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The 30 Worst Christmas Songs of All Time, Ranked

"The Christmas canon is so set in stone that we sometimes forget that there have been countless holiday songs released over the years that don't quite qualify as seasonal standards. These are the novelty tunes, satires, pranks, and misguided celebrations that constitute an alternative Christmas canon—the weird and terrible tunes that capture the excess of the holiday.
What follows is not a complete list of the strangest Christmas songs released over the years, but these seasonal oddities provide a pungent alternative to familiar favorites. They also make for one truly wild Christmas playlist if you dare to string them together."
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1
Santa Doesn't Cop Out on Dope - Sonic Youth
Santa Doesn't Cop Out on Dope - Sonic Youth
2
Santa and the Sidewalk Surfer - The Crossfires
Santa and the Sidewalk Surfer - The Crossfires
3
Merry Christmas Santa Claus (You're a Lovely Guy) - Max Headroom
Merry Christmas Santa Claus (You're a Lovely Guy) - Max Headroom
4
Mistress for Christmas - AC/DC
Mistress for Christmas - AC/DC
5
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer - William Shatner
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer - William Shatner
6
Deck My Balls - Afroman
Deck My Balls - Afroman
7
Xmas at K-Mart - Root Boy Slim & the Sex Change Band
Xmas at K-Mart - Root Boy Slim & the Sex Change Band
8
Dancin' With Santa - The Trashmen
Dancin' With Santa - The Trashmen
9
Funky, Funky, Xmas - New Kids on the Block
Funky, Funky, Xmas - New Kids on the Block
10
Don't Shoot Me Santa - The Killers Featuring Ryan Pardey
Don't Shoot Me Santa - The Killers Featuring Ryan Pardey
11
Snoopy's Christmas - The Royal Guardsmen
Snoopy's Christmas - The Royal Guardsmen
12
Christmas With the Devil - Spinal Tap
Christmas With the Devil - Spinal Tap
13
The Little Drum Machine Boy - Beck
The Little Drum Machine Boy - Beck
14
Christmas With Satan - James Chance
Christmas With Satan - James Chance
15
Cherry Cherry Christmas - Neil Diamond
Cherry Cherry Christmas - Neil Diamond
16
Back Door Santa - Bon Jovi
Back Door Santa - Bon Jovi
17
Mistletoe - Justin Bieber
Mistletoe - Justin Bieber
18
If It Doesn't Snow on Christmas - Joe Pesci
If It Doesn't Snow on Christmas - Joe Pesci
19
Santa Claus, the Original Hippie - Homer & Jethro
Santa Claus, the Original Hippie - Homer & Jethro
20
I'm Gonna Spend My Christmas With a Dalek - The Go-Go's
I'm Gonna Spend My Christmas With a Dalek - The Go-Go's
21
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reggae - Paul McCartney
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reggae - Paul McCartney
22
Please, Daddy (Don't Get Drunk This Christmas) - John Denver
Please, Daddy (Don't Get Drunk This Christmas) - John Denver
23
Last Christmas - Crazy Frog
Last Christmas - Crazy Frog
24
21st Century Christmas - Cliff Richard
21st Century Christmas - Cliff Richard
25
Christmas Tree - Lady Gaga
Christmas Tree - Lady Gaga
26
That's Christmas to Me - Pentatonix
That's Christmas to Me - Pentatonix
27
The Night Santa Went Crazy - Weird Al Yankovic
The Night Santa Went Crazy - Weird Al Yankovic
28
Dear Santa (Bring Me a Man for Christmas) - The Weather Girls
Dear Santa (Bring Me a Man for Christmas) - The Weather Girls
29
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer - Elmo & Patsy
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer - Elmo & Patsy
30
The Christmas Shoes - Newsong
The Christmas Shoes - Newsong
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